Together But Not Equal

From today's New York Times Metropolitan Diary:

Dear Diary:

In a sweltering August more than 25 years ago, on a long subway ride with no seat available, I stood holding onto a rail. With my free hand I held up my Hebrew Torah text.

In the early ’80s it was still somewhat novel for women to chant from the Torah. My husband, then a young rabbi, had recruited me to chant all the Torah readings for the High Holy Day pulpit he had signed on for in Texas. And, indeed, preparing all that chanting was a Texas-size task!

As I mumbled along, singsonging the ancient words, I glanced up and saw an Orthodox Jewish man doing precisely the same thing. Our nanosecond of bonding was followed by the fellow’s look of extreme confusion, as he quickly refocused his eyes on his text.

The poor guy. I often wonder: Did he tell anyone of this moment of worlds colliding?

I know it's a long shot, but part of me hopes that the Orthodox man in question reads this column and writes a response. I'm curious to hear his side of the story -- according to Orthodox tradition, a man isn't technically supposed to listen to a woman sing, let alone read Torah. On the other hand, what if that woman was the only one in her congregation who could handle learning the entire High Holiday Torah reading? Which would the man find worse -- a woman reading Torah or no Torah reading at all?

Unfortunately, there remain several ultra-religious Jews who believe that congregations are better off with the latter. There are even a handful of non-egalitarian Conservative congregations in which women are not permitted on the bimah, such as the one I visited this past weekend for an auf ruf. It seems almost hypocritical for a synagogue that allows mixed seating -- ie, men and women davening together as equals -- to not have both men and women read from the Torah. It's kind of like the "separate but equal" policy in place during the civil rights movement, but in reverse: Together, but not equal. 

From my understanding, it seems that some modern Orthodox communities have begun to relax the restrictions placed on women. Women's minyans are emerging in which women are permitted to read Torah and daven for one another. They're still separate, but at least they get to experience what it feels like to lead a congregation. I am reminded of how I felt when I visited the Western Wall on Shabbat during my Birthright trip: The men were singing and dancing and having a grand ol' time on their side of the wall, while the women were more mellow and plaintive. The men seemed to be having all the fun, and I felt like I was missing out.

Despite the obstacles, Jewish women have nevertheless come a long way in the 25 years since the female Torah reader and the Orthodox man met on the subway. Women have taken on a much more significant role in Jewish leadership, as evidenced by the fact that the majority of my future JTS classmates are female. It is no longer a novelty for women to read from the Torah, and I think that even the most Orthodox Jews are beginning to realize that increasing the role of women in prayer is a step in the right direction for Jewish continuity.